Mother's Instinct

I didn't really believe in "Mother's Instinct" until I had kids of mine own. It has only come into play a handful of times and this morning it did again. Creighton had a cough last night and his breathing seemed quite labored. He was soooo tired and onry though so I put his to bed. When he woke up this morning he was in bad shape. He was so tired he couldn't walk. He was too tired to eat breakfast. He way just lying there and when I looked at his chest in was caving in under his ribs and his heart was beating out of his chest as if he had just ran a marathon.

I knew things weren't good and thought maybe I should go to the emergency room. I called the dr. and left a message for the nurse and proceeded to give him his breathing treatment to help with his asthma. It helped a lot. It helped so much I started thinking maybe I shouldn't even keep the appointment the nurse had called me back and made. I knew I needed to go, however, and I went. They checked his oxygen level and it was at 90. I asked the nurse what I good level is and she said at least 95. Me...thinking just 5 points away thought, "Oh good then, it's not too bad." When the dr. came in later he informed me that 90 is actually hospitalization for 2 days bad. Creighton at this point is moving around and acting completely normal. He said that he obviously handles this VERY well. This scared me to death. It really makes me wonder what his Oxygen level was before I gave him the breathing treatment that morning. Scary. They gave him another treatment at the office and it rose to 92 so obviously the treatments work and we were sent home with prescriptions.

He is now on a liquid steroid (which the dr. informed me has a side effect of children getting EXTREMELY onry by the 3rd day....hopefully there won't be posts of this effect.), he is having his breathing treatments a couple times a day and I am more aware that Creighton needs his medicine. I believe that keeping this appointment today was for me. I was supposed to be giving him the steroid treatments everyday, twice a day, for the last year. This was to build up his lungs to help prevent the very thing that happened today. I failed my little boy. I am just so thankful it wasn't worse than what happened. I am grateful for my wake up call. So....if you ever talk to me or see me around, ask me if I am doing my job. I need reminders.