Reality

As I was laying in bed, unable to sleep, I was contemplating my day.  I was remembering how harsh I was to the hubby tonight when he arrived home from work late.  (The dang traffic is killing me!!  I am missing his 2 mile, NEVER any traffic commute.)  While I was recalling this, my bitter self thought I should write a post about reality bites.  However, I couldn't bring myself to title it that.  Truth is, it's just reality and I couldn't be more thankful for it.

Without the bitter, you wouldn't know the sweet.  Without my kids yelling and screaming, I wouldn't appreciate and love the sound of their breath going in and out while they sleep.  Without going nights without sleep when my babies were babies, I wouldn't appreciate that first night they slept through the night.  Without going jobless for a while, I wouldn't appreciate having a job.  Reality makes me appreciate.

I am so appreciative.

I can tell you right here and now that I am the most blessed individual on the face of the Earth.  I may tear my hair out sometimes; but I will still be the most blessed, though possibly hairless, individual.

Our lesson the last two Sundays (we went to two different wards) was on the scriptures in Matthew that refers to the Savior's yoke is easy and he makes our burdens light.  Perhaps I needed to hear it twice to get it to really sink into my thick skull, but it did and it is embedded in my heart.  One sister in the class described what a yoke was.  When that yoke is on right, and you have both oxen pulling, it is definitely much easier than if that yoke is askew and one oxen is really doing the pulling.  This is life and I can testify of it.  When my life is aligned with the Savior, He is pulling right with me.  Is it hard?  Is it always easy to pull the load?  Heck no.  However, my burdens are made light with Him and He is there by my side.  Pulling right with me.

These last six months (I can't believe it's been 6 months) have been a time of uncertainty.  I remember when we found out about the layoffs and I was upbeat.  I wasn't worried.  I think I told everyone that I wasn't worried, everything would be fine....however, if it came March and we hadn't found something, I might be singing a different tune.  Mitch got his job offer on February 28th.  There were many times before that date that I wondered why.  I wondered when.  I wondered if we had misread the promptings of the spirit and done something wrong. 

I write tonight with a full heart.  I heart full of gratitude.  Gratitude to my Father in Heaven for being with me in the yoke and making my burdens light.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that He is there for me.  He loves me and He knows what's best for me and will grant it at the appropriate time...not just the time that I want.  I appreciate this life lesson and although I have learned it before, I am sure I will need to learn it again. 

I write this post to my little boys.

Boys,

I want you to know that your mommy has a testimony of Heavenly Father and of Jesus Christ.  You will go through hard times.  You will go through times of uncertainty and you will go through times when you feel like your burden is too heavy to bear.  He is there for you.  He hears and answers your prayers.  He will make your burden light.  I know this.  Be patient. 

Love you geese.
Love,
Mom